Written by Abby of 4onemore.com.
We’ve all been there. Scrolling through Facebook or Instagram and feeling like a failure.
Look at her house!
Look at that perfect birthday party.
Her kids are perfect.
Her marriage is perfect.
She is an amazing homeschool mom.
What’s wrong with me?
Maybe these are the thoughts that you have. You feel emotionally and physically exhausted. There are more conflicts in your house than normal. You have absolutely no motivation. You dread homeschooling each day. In fact, you might even be ready to quit.
The problem is that you’re doing all the things to try to measure up to the “ideal” that only exists on Instagram.
You need to say goodbye to the proverbial Joneses (they don’t exist anyway) and find your way back toward contentment.
Here are 7 steps to take in a season of burnout.
Remember your WHY
Why are you homeschooling in the first place? What are the priorities that drive these decisions for your family? Your reasons will not look the same as the mom down the street. And that’s okay. Stop comparing.
Are you embracing homeschooling this year because your son needs that one-on-one attention and help with math?
Is your family homeschooling this year because the flexibility it provides allows you to take days off when dad is home?
Did you decide to homeschool for another year because you want to teach your children a certain worldview, and the private school is just too expensive?
Know your family’s reasons for educating the kids at home and be thankful and content. This will help to ease the overwhelm that can lead to burnout.
But there are practical steps you can take as well.
Zero-Based Scheduling
Many of us cram our calendar full with all the activities, all the extras, the volunteer commitments we are guilted into accepting, and the social events that we think we have to attend. We have a big problem!
It’s easy to see why we suffer from burnout.
A zero-based schedule works just like a zero-based budget. You are not starting from the status quo of how you’ve always “spent” your time. No, each item has to be analyzed and earn a spot in your schedule.
Start by taking everything off your family calendar. Begin with a blank slate.
Then slowly put things back on based on your WHY and your family’s priorities in this season.
What is essential? Add that in first.
Once the essentials are determined, decide how much mental, emotional, and physical room is left for additional commitments.
Control your schedule. Don’t let it control you.
Once your schedule aligns with your WHY, take a look at how you homeschool.
Simplify Homeschool
In a hard season especially, make sure the focus is on relationship over curriculum. Spend that extra time enjoying your kids while the textbooks remain closed for a bit.
But can we just all admit that it’s hard to simplify, pull back, and declutter our schedules when it looks like all the other homeschool moms are doing it all? Here’s the next step to helping yourself out of burnout, and it’s essential.
Recognize triggers to FOMO and be proactive
Have you heard of FOMO? It’s the fear of missing out. It’s a real emotion, and it’s become larger than life in our social media-obsessed culture. Having access to Facebook and Instagram is alluring, but for most of us, it’s not helping us to cultivate contentment. In fact, it could be contributing to our burnout.
We see the façade that’s portrayed on social media and we believe that it defines our friend’s life. I mean, if she put that picture of her perfectly styled living room on Instagram, that must mean that it always looks that way, that her laundry isn’t actually sitting in a pile just off frame, and that her kids never pull the LEGO bin out to play.
Truly, we somehow believe that everyone has a perfect life because their social media accounts told us so! We feel like we’re the only ones who aren’t perfect. We’re missing out.
So, identify your triggers to FOMO and be proactive.
Maybe being on social media isn’t good for you at all. Get rid of it for a season. But at least, while you’re homeschooling (and probably for a good part of your day). You will be emotionally healthier if you’re not scrolling.
Jim Elliot was a missionary to Ecuador in the 1950's who was martyred while trying to evangelize the Huaorani people.
I think of his quote often in relation to FOMO. He said: “Wherever you are, be all there!”
If you’re homeschooling, put all your mental and emotional energy into that task. If you’re on a date with hubby, don’t be thinking of your mental to-do list. No, wherever you are, be all there.
Self-Care
But we need to make sure we’re taking care of ourselves, especially when walking through a season of burnout.
This can be done in dozens of ways, but can I just mention two particular things? Sleep and personality type.
It’s amazing how off-center we feel when we’re robbing ourselves of life-giving sleep. As much as possible, make sure to get enough sleep.
Watch out for personality-specific self-care solutions. Sometimes burnout creeps in because we’re ignoring how we’re wired.
As an introvert, I can feel very rundown when I’m spread too thin. I need to recharge in solitude, clear the schedule, and hunker down at home after an exhausting event.
Passion Projects
When you’re starting with a zero-based schedule, make sure to allow yourself time and space to pursue these things! It will do wonders to help lift you out of an exhausting season.
And finally, the most important step.
Grace
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As a former classroom teacher, now homeschool mom of five, Abby loves to equip & encourage other homeschool families. Parents are uniquely gifted to teach their kids! Join her at 4onemore.com to learn how to homeschool with moxie --> it's about embracing your journey & finding your groove.
Follow along on Pinterest here.
Are you wondering if you have what it takes to homeschool? Grab Abby’s free course here. Homeschooling 101: Basics for Parents Before You Start
Thanks for sharing this great blog! Why are we doing homeschooling? If we find out answer of this question, then you will complete your half way. I can Assure that those who understand this blog clearly it would really help the parents who are starting homeschooling their children
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