Confessions of an Organized Mess

This social media thing is a bit of an allusion. Isn't it? Facebook, Instagram, and (Dare I say it?) mommy blogs are all curators of "awesome." They parade the highlight reels of a person's life for all to see...whether the rest of us like it or not. 

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When I look at the collective "awesome" of everyone online, it's easy to believe that EVERYONE is awesome at ALL of those things. And that because I'm not, I somehow fall short. But the truth is, most of us are just awesome at one or two things and pretty mediocre at all the rest.

Have I lost you?

Let me spin it for you this way.

Last year, I read a book by famed mommy-finance blogger, Crystal Paine. I've followed her blog, Money Saving Mom, for years and have, sadly, fallen prey to the comparison trap while reading it (more times than I'd care to admit.)

On the 14-inch fishbowl...I mean, computer {ahem}, she always came across as a Mary Poppins 2.0. You know the type...practically perfect in every way. That is until I read her book.

It was such a game changer. But, not because it offered great tips on organization. Which it did. In fact, it was chock full of all that and more. Ironically, however, that's not what made the book so life-giving to me.

I glossed over the pages and pages that detailed what she DOES with her time and energy and focused my lens on the two or three paragraphs that told what she DOESN'T do. In the very first chapter, she confessed that she does not do a lot of cooking but chooses to eat out a few times a week instead. She hires a maid service on occasion. And, she has a team of people to help with the behind the scenes happenings of her blog. (Please don't think I'm judging her in this. On the contrary, kudos to her for being smart enough to whisper a NO to some things in her life in order to have space and time to shout YES to the rest.)

After reading that small list of disclosures, I wasn't sure if I should cry out of relief...like full-on UGLY tears...mascara running and everything...OR, begin the slow clap building to a crescendo. Her words were so transforming to me. You see, I had created this illusion of her in my head...it was a spotted-unicorn kind of fantasy that was part her and part me and part every-great-woman-I-had-ever-met. 

I assumed that in addition to finding the time to be uber organized and financially savvy, she ALSO managed to do all the other areas of life with an equal amount of awesome. My misplaced neurosis was not in any way her doing. No, that crazy train was all completely conducted by yours truly. I had taken her highlight reels and measured them against my "every day." 

My living room on most school days.

The truth is, I'm pretty underwhelming at most things and a hot mess of chaos at everything else. I'm almost always late...to everything. I can never find my cell phone even though I'd take a blood oath that I put it back in the-exact-same-spot-every-time. I have a kitchen drawer that is the Bermuda Triangle of spice jars. And I'm pretty sure that if I forget to show up to one more chiropractor appointment, my doctor is going to file a missing person's report.

The Bermuda Triangle of spices.

BUT

While I can make mediocrity look like an Olympic sport in some areas of my life, I'm pretty awesome in others. Because the truth is, everyone's awesome at SOMETHING. That's true for me. And it's true for you.

I can decorate birthday cakes like a boss. I'm a stellar paper organizer. And I've got this whole homeschooling thing under control (in theory, anyway). And I don't mind saying so.

Bubblegum birthday party cake for my Sweets.

My point is this...

Perhaps if a few of us could be brave enough to admit that although we don't have it all together, we are awesome at our "awesome"s, it would give other women the courage to do the same.

I can't play your note and you can't play mine. Because if we were all playing the same thing, the music would sound rather flat. 

So, thanks for joining me for my "highlight reel," but please remember it is just THAT. The rest of my life is just an organized mess.

You are awesome, Sweet Momma. Embrace it.
Your awesome might look different from mine.
And that's OK. The end.